East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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