Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
