I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
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