Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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