I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
