But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Sext me about skeletons
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
