What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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