oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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