he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
