i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
