Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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