Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize
