Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
