omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
