sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
