I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
