I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
