Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
