Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
