I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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