Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize