Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
