Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
