bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
