Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
