Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
