office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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