butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
