TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
