You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
