There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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