every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Randomize
