But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
