only if we run a train.
done.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
