I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
