i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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