I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Randomize
