part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
