all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
