I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
