it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize