Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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