i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
When are your genitals available?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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