How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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