If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
