all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
