yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
