he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
