Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
i out mim tonsoeep
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