shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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