Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize